VIRTUAL | First Couples Session
- 1 hr 30 min1 hour 30 minutes
- 375 US dollars$375
In my book titled “Lasting Lover: A Science-Based Approach to Building and Maintaining a Romantic Relationship With Your Forever Person” I explain how couples therapy can be tricky. If your therapist doesn’t know what they’re doing (particularly when there is a history of trauma) they can actually hurt your relationship through the counseling process. This typically happens when they ask you to focus mostly on the problems in your relationship during a session. If they do this, you can be certain that they’re not in touch with the research around what it takes to develop and sustain a strong relationship . This is because there is strong evidence to suggest couples who are able to build and sustain healthy relationships, must consistently maintain a 5 to 1 ratio of positive to negative interactions to keep the “good feelings” or what researchers call “positive sentiment” in a relationship. With this in mind, any negative things that take place in front of the therapist–like back and forth “he said she said” bashing during a session–can do harm to your relationship. In other words, during our sessions I won’t simply set back and watch you fight with your partner. You can do this on your own time. I have carefully tailored my Integrative Behavioral Couple Therapy approach in a way that gets you, the couple, working toward common goals based on the “principles of happy romantic marriage” instead of rehashing old problems. This approach relies on a trans-theoretical model that integrates “what works” in Imago Therapy, Emotionally Focussed Couples Therapy, and the Gottman Method, with “what works” in Mindful Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (M-CBT) in a way that helps couples heal as individuals and, start fighting “for their marriage” instead of “for their point of view.” For example, one of the exercises I engage couples in is to develop a “Relationship Vision.” The negotiation and compromise that goes into this process improves communication and conflict resolution skills and, in turn, will begin to heal your relationship. The vision and goals that come out of this process will provide you with a common set of relationship standards against which you can begin to measure how you are doing. As your new plan for working together begins to materialize, your hope for a promising future begins to return and, your focus on all the problems that brought you to therapy begins to fade in importance. The point is, focussing on a new, common direction will help you g
Because Dr. Cole is in a private, solo practice, he loses the full amount of the cost of your session if you decide to reschedule or cancel your appointment without giving us sufficient time to back-fill your scheduled appointment. Accordingly, we request a 24 hours notice for rescheduling or canceling an appointment. There is no charge for rescheduling or canceling an appointment prior to this 24-hour window of time. If you reschedule or cancel your session without a 24-hour notice we reserve the right to charge the credit card you have on file with our office the full amount of a clinic hour.