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Application & Description of Services

This is where new clients apply to be accepted into my practice. Because I am not the best fit for every individual seeking help, I want to understand your situation before I agree to start seeing you. The following summaries of the types of psychotherapy, counseling, and coaching I provide may help you better understand whether or not I am a good fit for your circumstances. Please read the description of the type of psychotherapy or coaching you are seeking, and then, if it seems like I am a good fit, complete the “New Client Application Form.”

​​​​Individual Psychotherapy — As a trauma-trained cognitive behavioral therapist (CBT) and a certified clinical hypnotherapist, I specialize in treating individuals 18 years and older with a wide range of conditions like depression, anxiety disorders, obsessive-compulsive (OCD), post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD), anger disorders, and adult AD(H)D. My approach has been widely adopted and is described in the scientific journal "Cogent Psychology." I have simplified his process and made it accessible to the general public in his books “Wise Up, Change is Hard: 8 Science-Based Steps for Making it Stick” and “The Routine Practice Planner.”

 

Individual Coaching —The name "coaching" uses a metaphor from the sports community where coaching is an established activity. I'm very familiar with this activity, given that my first job out of college was as a head baseball coach in a small college in the Midwest. In this position, my responsibility was to partner with and help the athletes I recruited to try to reach excellence. Although in my clinical and sports psychology work, I've stayed directly connected to both college and professional athletes (l am President of Alive+Well Sports @ www.aliveandwellsports.com), I've expanded my coaching and consulting to help individuals who work in the highest levels of business and government across the U.S. and around the globe.

 

While most coaching practitioners tend to focus on Life Coaching, my coaching practice can better be described as Positive Psychology Coaching (PPC). The gist is that PPC is a scientifically rooted approach to helping clients increase well-being, enhance and apply strengths, optimize performance, and achieve valued goals. At the core of PPC is a belief in the power of science to elucidate the best methods for development and personal growth (Kauffman, Boniwell, and Silberman, 2010). Within positive psychology, many assessments, resources, tools, and feedback models can help me build a highly tailored, structured coaching journey that is ultimately backed up with measurable evidence. If you decide to work with me in a coaching context, I will make you more aware of your reasons for current habits, beliefs, attitudes, actions, and goals. I will also help you learn new skills, establish new habits, and provide you with tools to build a more satisfying and successful future that is consistent with your goals and ambitions. 

 

Couples Therapy, Counseling, and Coaching — I offer Discernment Counseling, Couples Therapy, and Relationship Coaching. These are described as follows:

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Discernment Counseling is best suited for couples on the brink of divorce. I know that “couples” rarely decide to divorce…it’s typically one person who wants to leave (the “leaning out” partner) while their partner (the leaning in partner) is “being divorced.” When this happens, it’s a crucible moment that needs to be considered carefully. Although separation may be an emergency, divorce is not. Because both a commitment and life structure have been created…it’s good to take some time to decide. In such cases, I will meet with the two of you separately to understand the situation and help you decide whether or not to stay. If you choose to stay together, we will transition to Couples Therapy. If not, I can help you “consciously uncouple” in a way that reduces chaos and enables you to get some clarity about your future.

 

Couples Therapy is a form of psychotherapy that can help you and your partner improve your relationship. In my book “Lasting Lover: A Science-Based Approach to Building and Maintaining a Romantic Relationship With Your Forever Person,” I explain that Couples Therapy is a therapy in which both partners in a committed relationship are treated simultaneously. I also explain that because of the complexities of treating two individuals and their relationship at the same time, it is fraught with hazards that can only be avoided by carefully identifying core issues and addressing them in a practical, effective manner. Some benefits of couples counseling include better communication between you and your partner; identifying problems and resolving them within a safe environment; hearing and understanding your partner’s needs without resentment or anger; feeling more valued and a deeper connection; renewed physical and emotional intimacy, and moving away from the past to a brighter future.

 

Couples Therapy is not a chance to criticize your partner in front of another witness. I will do my best to prevent this. If I lose control or if you are out of control, I will seamlessly switch from Couples Therapy to Relationship Coaching.

 

Relationship Coaching -- I've discovered that Relationship Coaching is the best approach when you are emotionally dysregulated and when I observe “relationship skill deficits.” In my book “Lasting Lover: A Science-Based Approach to Building and Maintaining a Romantic Relationship With Your Forever Person,” I explain: 

“Although attraction and love are undoubtedly important, depending on these things alone is like playing a baseball game without any skills. Even if you love the game and your teammates, you will consistently lose if you don’t know how to play." 

 

Similarly, suppose you don’t learn the relationship skills necessary for developing and sustaining a happy, healthy romantic relationship. In that case, you will undoubtedly fall short of your expectations and be in a disconnected, floundering marriage despite your best intentions. Not only that, but your love for long-term romantic relationships will fade…”

 

Relationship Coaching is a goal-oriented approach to teaching relationship skills and solving relationship problems. It can help you create a relationship vision, identify your relationship's weaknesses, set goals to improve your relationship, and work with your relationship coach, who will hold you accountable for achieving your goals. 

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NOTE: As per the consent of both parties, I will conduct separate sessions with an individual displaying signs of trauma. This is aimed at facilitating progress towards more effective couples therapy.

 

Family Therapy and Parenting Support — Family Therapy can make a difference if your family is going through a tough time—from stress, anger, or grief. It can help couples, children, or members of an extended family learn to communicate better and work through conflicts and hardship.

 

Family therapy is often short-term. It may include all family members or just those able or willing to participate. In these sessions, I can facilitate communication and teach you skills to deepen family connections and get through stressful times, even after you go to therapy sessions. 

 

Having fully participated in raising children to adulthood, I know firsthand how difficult parenting can be. If you need help in this area, I can help you develop and implement a parenting plan based on my book “Parenting Teens & Tweens: How to Raise Healthy Humans with Character.” This process involves helping you develop a plan tailored to the needs of your family and children. For example, I can provide you with guidance on how to establish and communicate boundaries, how to contract desired behaviors, how to motivate your children to do what they say they’ll do, how to understand your family brand, how to evaluate performance, and when and how to obtain resources (books, training) or call in a consultant (counselor, religious leader, teacher) to provide you with insight into complex problems.

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